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I have to admit, yesterday I felt so in tune with myself. And today I’m out of whack and trying to realign, seeking that flame of inner light, the source of inspiration I’m chasing. Hence this spontaneous action of pulling out my phone and pressing record. Lemme try my own version of “slam poetry”, whatever that means, however I wanna define it. Bear with me, all right?

Today was a bit of a bad hair day. Today I was productive, checking lots off my to-do list, yet stuck in some other things. Fascinating how life moves through a spectrum of experiences, feeling great on one hand and struggling on the other. Both sides merge, at once. Life is like an endless wave atop another, and in the midst of a sunset there comes a screaming, thrashing wave of disarray and wreckage and conflict, then it comes to a smooth sail, gently kissing the shore, and as it’s pulled back it returns into a beast of an existence once again.

All these volatile emotions and happenings clashing, then once again coming to a smooth roll of contentment. It becomes… somewhat of a rhythm. A cycle… of life. That. Our hearts beat and bleed, at times pounding with anxiety, worry, stress… Then it feels slow, calm, peaceful, filled with joy. Softly, on a Friday and Saturday, and as Sunday approaches it begins to hum erratically once again. That neverending ride. Sometimes I ride, sometimes I thrash for some kind of relief. Constant.

Sometimes we may feel stuck, tied down. Sometimes we may feel free, on top of the world, rejuvenated. It’s a mix. Wave after another. We can feel a part of our lives clashing, another part blissful. That, that. The world is going through that right now.

As w… Ahh! Word vomit, words all jumbled. That’s how my brain works. I could press stop, I could retake this, messed up, again, must be perfect. My bra strap is showing. Must fix. …Let it go. Just be real. Just be true to yourself. Be patient.

I feel like I’m talking with passion, some kind of slam poetry mindset, where I keep churning out my brain workings. Again… I have to remember what life is full of. Everything is coexisting at once. It’s ok to feel these highs and lows at once. That’s how life is supposed to be. Want everything to be expected, monotonous? Nah. We want life. Excitement. Down moments so we can appreciate the good. The good so we can learn how to be better in chaos.

Learn how to grow and thrive. Life is full of lessons. Life is full of challenges. We are each full of many things. I was struggling with motivation today, and feel the pressure to create content, something. I realized it’s okay to just breathe. Yet, it turns out this influx of emotions induced me to create something right now. Believe in the process. Believe in yourself. Breathe. Be patient. Take it day by day.

And now I conclude my random slam poetry ASL version thing as I sit cross legged with my blanket late at night with my messy hair, and the point is… We’re human. All of us are in this together.

Mic drop and thank you.